FMA:Total RANDOMNESS! What If My Brother Met Ed
by The-SilverWolf-Alchemist
Summary: Just as the title says...A short little product of high sugar intake.. No actual pairings rating could differ..
1. Nothing BUT Randomness

HI GUYS!!!! If you're reading my other story, _FullMetal Alchemist: Life After_, I'm sorry it's taking so long to update. Anyway, my brother and I (mostly my brother in some parts) wrote this together months ago, though I'm not sure how many. We were on a sugar high, I think, and he happened to be on the computer at the time. Since he doesn't have an account, I'm putting this up for him. Please enjoy and R&R!!

Disclaimer: I do not own FMA but any other random characters belong to my brother and I...There might be a lot of them so be prepared!!

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Chapter 1: Nothing BUT Randomness

Year: 1914 Day: Who cares Time: 10:50...I think...let me check...Ok well my watch says midnight but I disagree I control this world you scrawny little pipsqueak!

Ed: "WHO YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK MIDGET YOU TWO FACED MINK!!!!???"

Bro: "Heh heh you are short you little mouse."

Me: "Wha oh! HEAD FOR THE HILLS! DIVE INTO ALPHONSE GO GO GO MOVE MOVE MOVE!"

CRACK!!!

Bro: "AAAAWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!"

Off Narator: "Why am I here? I was in ballet class a minute ago! WHY AM I GAY!!???"

GURGLE GURGLE SPLAT GUNK

Bro: "OWWWW!!"

Really Off Narator: "Hi I'm Scott and I'm singing my number one song of the year Cucumber!...I'm...a cucumber I'm a cucumber I'm a cucumber but please don't put me in a..._dancebreak_...pickle jaaarrrrrrrr!!!"

Bro:"Heh heh sing it again! what the...? AAAAHHH MMMMMYYY AAARRRMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" RRRRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPPPP!!

Man in suit: "Aaawww right WHO CUT THE CHEESE??!!!! AAAWW OPEN A WINDOW!"

Odd man I think: "Soorrryyyy!!" pppooooofffff

Me: "I think it's over... NOPE! Duck! That was his arm by the way!"

Al: "Don't I have a say in this!"

Everyone: "...NNNOOOOO!!!!!!!!"

Dead Silence: YOU DON'T NEED ME!!! GET!!!!!...

Me: Lift's Al's helm slightly and peers through gap but changes her mind cause it's such a gruesome sight that she can't even look at her bro's remains (Who would?) ..."Poor brother _sigh_...hard to believe he comes back in the next chapter...WHO WANTS MILK??!!!"

Ed: "...NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! GET AWAY GET AWAY!!!!! but I'll have oj thanks."

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Well I hope you enjoyed this chapter because the randomness is bound to continue! We'll update when we can and, don't worry, there's more to come on my other stories.

Please press that lonely little button down there. It doesn't get any attention.

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	2. The RANDOMNESS Continues!

This one's knid of short, like someone else I know! Luckily, he's not here at the moment...I hope. Anyway, here's the next chappie!!

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Chapter 2: The Actual Story From my Dumb Brother BEGINS!!!!

Note: My brother actually came up with this little... uh oh... bit. RUN!

Me: Where it starts is my brother is in a ballroom for state alchemists only I say as a parrot dressed like a pirate walks by ...ONLY YOU FAKE!!! ONLY!!!!... anyway he get's a drink when he meets Edward by the punch table... If only it were a PUNCH table then we'd be happy :) and so it begins...

Ed: Hey are you new?

Bro: No, maybe, why do you ask tch tch...

Ed: Uuuh no reason

Bro: Hey you look nice in the umm bear dress?

Ed: Why thank you!

Ed's mind: Why thank GOD you're still alive from last chapter evil grin

Bro: Umm I think the person who drawed you gave you a big head... ahh hahahah... tch tch.

Ed: why... thank you you called me big... you used big in a sentence! YOU HEAR THAT VIC! I'M BIG MWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!! Ed points at bro as if he were to kill him with a gun yes a GUN! makes a clicky click click noise thing da hahahah

Me: Suddenly a spark appears from the tip of Ed's finger and my brother's hair catches on fire. Here's his reaction...

Bro: AAAAHHHHH MY HAIR IT'S FREAKING ON FIRE MAN PUT IT OUT PUT IT OUT PUT IT OUT!!!!

Mustang: Alright already...grabs bro and throws him outside

Bro: NOT THAT OUT I MEANT OUT WITH WATER!!!

Mustang: So? Now you're a hot head what else is new? I saved the building at least...

Ed: Frantically tries to put out fire by doing the same gun cock thing

Bro: AAAAHHHHH NOW I HAVE RADIOACTIVE WASTE ON MY #&$!  
HEAD! GET IT OFF!

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Don't cry..that was only part one of this chapter! Now you know what to do: press that lonely little purple button down there and please rate and review!

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	3. End

Part 2 of Chapter 2 

Me: As you can see this goes on for a while including supersubzero ice, a miniature sun,  
and a raving talking blackhole of doom that goes to another dimension, and a psycotic freak who's head is a number of odd mutated umm things... use your imagination...oh,  
and a creep who is amazingly being amused. ( Take a guess ladies and guys who is the creep of the relationship?, Who annoys Ed the most?, Who - Roy: Alright I get it I'm a creep! - Me: Wow you just realize this? King of the miniskirt army! Now on with the show!

Roy puzzled: I have a miniskirt army? sweet.

Riza: Cocks gun and points at Roy's head Don't even think about it...

Ed: Does one more cock thingy noise with the finger gun and get's a... squirt gun  
Umm ok weeiiiirrrrddddd... starts to put out fire and finally puts it out whew glad that's over.

Bro: Whew glad I'm alive! see ya gotta go dance (with what's left anyway) Bro walks in ballroom saying hey looking good... what's up while people are staring at him with disgusted looks some of which can't even be... described

Ed: Looks at plants by feet I wonder... playfully squirting "finger gun" at plants and makes these little sprinkler noises while watering well... like a sprinkler! Heh heh evil grin,sneaks by Roy Mustang and squirts gloves really quickly then sprays his face! Haha eat that you creepy perv.!

Mustang: You better run cause you're going to lose you're jacket you wah?... Ah dang it!  
Curse you FullMetalAlchemist!

Me: And sorry to say it's over ( MMMWWWWWAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!) Bye! RUN FROM MUSTANG ED RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!

Al: Man why do I have to be the one that never gets a part... wait! I do have a part me a trashcan a tra... curse you BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!!!

Me: What the Al Buzz is not here.

Al: No fair

Me: Why don't you hide Edward for me k?

Al: Can't, I have way to many kittens for a job like that. 8 Bye! See ya next chapter on FMA randomness!

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Unfortunately, there is no next chapter. Sorry guys. Hope you enjoyed it though!


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